WAIT. PLEASE I shout, I had just
managed to capture the bus drivers attention as it was about to head
off. I jumped on and said thank you while feeling a little out of
breath. The bus driver then for whatever reason just looked up at me
and greeted me with a look of disgust while shaking his head in
frustration. At that moment deep down I wanted to punch him square in
the nose and watch it explode with sprays of delightful shades of
electric crimson red blood glistening from the winter sun. Or maybe
think of the film Fight Club and the scene where Edward Norton
(Myself) is sitting comfortably on top of the poor blonde man's chest
with his arms pinned down (the bus driver) now gets his face pounded
to shit left to right until nearly all of his teeth is removed and
gags on his own blood. Haven't seen Fight Club? No. Shame, I reckon
you are missing out. Oh and it stars Brad Pitt. Remember you are not
a unique and beautiful snowflake and also self improvement is
masturbation. Go fuck yourself.
Making less of a scene here though
through scenes of violence, even a simple Go Fuck Yourself would have
felt good. That is what I should have told the bus driver. Instead I
just muttered my anger briefly, sat down slowly and shook my head
feeling my blood slowly boil on a medium to high heat. If it was
going to piss you off that much BUS DRIVER, why didn't you just
fucking drive off and leave me there in the bitter cold, you fucking
twat. What lovely thoughts I have. With my blood pressure having now
returned to normal on my short journey I eventually leave the bus but
not before I stop and turn to him and shake my head with a look of
utter disgust first. This is my great comeback, my great reply, my
great moment. I admit It felt rather disappointing when being
compared to seeing my fist covered in blood. I must add that I have
never been in a blood bath fight or even a decent fight to that
matter, so maybe that's way it seems more appealing to have physical
fights involved in my imagination. A decent punch up is now being
added to my bucket list.
Don't kid yourself young man.
My next meeting with the same bus
driver weeks later presented me with another glorious opportunity to
act on my first instincts. Picture this, I lay my money down and tell
him my journey. A return ticket to Seaview Road please driver I say.
He seems a lot happier today it seems. Actually I am not going to
tell the rest of this pointless story, its more extreme that's for
sure, although I believe you get the jest of it now. The driver gets
a warning from his manager and I nearly used my bag full of my dads
spanners as a weapon. That is all. Sorry, maybe you really want to
know what happened? Well, maybe I will tell the story further on down
the line. There's not much time!
Make time you prick.
They say a watched
pot won't ever boil. And it's not heaven or God that I am searching
for. My thoughts get drowned out from the children's programmes. Your
children only get one childhood and I am wasting a small part of it
to write these simple stories. So lets hope you can relate to them in
some way and get something if anything out of this blog to help you
in whatever path you are on.
Stay positive dickhead.
It's snowing
outside. So I'm now off out to build a snowman with my son, back
soon.
Make sure you came back soon you
silly water melons.
